Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Ah yes, i've been looking around more seriously for signs regarding the thailand trip. and no leh, don't see any signs. then it falls back to peace. do you have it in your heart or not. and yep. im at peace. on monday, i prayed to ask for anyone to just bring up a thailand topic during the day. and nope. monday went by and dun have. hope i did not miss it though. but that's ok.
However, a few times, my itunes player coincidentally plays 'so you would come' which strongly reminds me of my time there. it sorta transports me back to that little church building in front of a pig stye (oops! forgot the thai term for church :( ) where we(alissa, kheng ling and my sis) taught the song to the little kiddies. their faces still vivdid in my mind. maybe its with the help of pictures and not so much my memory.and 'we are the reason' to remind me of the time. during christmas and what it was like, huddling together working hard on the christmas play. and yea, not gg to chiang mai means i'll miss out on the chance to be part of the pay justin would stage)put together might b a better word. 'stage; sounds too big scale!) again for the mission trip.
but you know what, there's lotsa to do before they actually fly off. maybe if im really wanting to stick my butt in this business then i can help on ground, in mainland singapore! and as for the memories. well. maybe it just means i'll be able to go back there some other time, in the future, where only God knows. i just hope all this tiny longings just don't disappear compeletely cos they're rather precious.(to me)
A little more interesting something. well, my speech is die this friday! and i really had no idea what topic to choose. not panic-ing over it yet. but felt a little loss. from a varied choice list of nine topics, which should i choose? red,music,eco-tourism,villains,nightmares?
well, i could guess the more popular topics would be red, or villains. but just then, i heard a line from the song 'held' by twila paris. suddenly this line : 'who told us we'd be rescued,what has changed and why should
we be saved from nightmares..'
and then things flowed from there. so there and then i just opened word and typed away. and Thank God! the speech flowed to 2 pages long. so content wise. i think it won't be too short. plus, as i was musing over 'wah! die! need real references and citations of material used?!' how! knowing me to be such an empty brain. and you know what i decided to use??!! haha. so excited! i happily re-used my utopian texts knowledge to portray sth much worse than what childhood nightmares we might have suffered from as a child. the existence in a nightmarish present scenario! so from then on, i can happily sound smart pants and cite aldous huxley, george orwell and maragaret atwoon and juliand barnes! haha. i may be a cheater. but im certainly a very happy girl to be able to re-use these lovely things i learnt in jc. and yay! wow my tutorial class too! with those scary ideas! hehe. ok. that's.if.i.deliver.the.speech.well,nice.and.slow. lit is always useful!! theeeheeee!
and thanks to darling swee! she helped me refind myself and find the courage to place myself on the running track again! if this goes on, then good for her, her friend is back! no longer the sloppy pig mess.:) :)
tomorrow is wednesday. early start. yet there's no tests whatsoever, so im relaxed :)
im beginning to remember the benefits of exercise. and the movements in my body!! that's what friends are really for! they find you when you've lost yourself. and one of them dear ones, is my darling swee heehee ling!!! :D +muaah+hug*
charlene said a lil' prayer for you at 11:38 PM
