Friday, February 17, 2006
i've never beeen this lagging in blogging! but Thank God! all's well and good. finally found a job. and im happy! going for a few interviews made me realise that jobs don't come easy. even menial ones. there was a period of time when i was still jobless, i sat in the foodcourt and looked at the cleaner and thoought..i wouldn't even be able to get that job. but i think cleaner's job is quite fun. that aside, i felt slim chances on even getting such a job cos.. even they had to fill in job application forms and go thru interviews.was overwhelmed with this strange desire to snatch the job from the cleaner lady. i got rejected twice you see, till i got my gelato job :)
but it was all due to my stupidity. i must share this joke of myself. that when entering a delifrance job application form way back in abt e second week of jan, i filled in expected pay at $7!! hahaa. my parents ask 'who i think i was'. even the manager doesnt get so much:P:P well.. on my part..at that time i thot 5 bucks per hr was too meagre a pay so i tried to increase ambition abit and shoot for seven bucks. of course! the call never came and my applicaton form, probably used to wipe the glass panels.
and thanks to denise and charlene, and a nice mrs Tan, swee and i got a job at frutta la viva , located under the bridge and one fullerton. it really helps when u got contacts and friends. its really much much easier to get the job that way. since then, its been regular cups of free gelato, which is comfortably layering its digested form on my hips in subtle layers.
going back to zhenghua was also nice. the school is much nicer now. with a lot more colour and kiddy looking things which i like. but the unique back colour of one wall in a distinct colour in every classroom has been changed to one colour so it looks normal. it really makes a difference that you yourself was once running along and laughing along those corridors. i feel i can connect with the students there although they think i must hail from some other life too distant from theirs. but little do they know,i was one of them before, yet still them now. when i step into a class, i can picture myself sitting at the back in that familiar red and black. which they think no one will understand. but i do! i can still see myself there with lydia and huiteng and seetaram panday! rafiz with his gulla and fadhil. desmond,fadhillah,nadiah etc etc.. but alas those years have gone into memory. i now approach them in this detached form as a teacher dressed in a totally different garb, set apart just by that very difference in material we wear on our bodies. a lil set apart and cant quite get their attention most times. their noise level can be deafening. there's still that distinction between teacher and student. as if im cordonned off by a glass which separates the whiteboard and front from the rest of the class space. all that difference now. but all that will be easily scraped away should i one day walk into school and class in my own set of red and black.
it's also funny that my teachers are all the same. i think it evokes in them this weird feeling when they see an old student in their space(ie:staffroom) yet on legal terms. i guess they feel that either they've aged or time takes a standstill where by they're still them yet somehow, those they've once tutored before have gone on and become a lil more grown up without their realisation until one of us pops back in and reminds them they have forgotten the time factor in those short 3 years. and i guess that's how it is with teachers. you are just trapped in your little school, walking between the staffroom and classrooms and occasional canteen visit through the years, teaching batch after batch of students..showing them the way to move on, yet you yourself are stuck there. yet its not all that bad cos you derive joy from teaching and 'moulding lives' plus the occasional visit from old students. or perhaps..being around students just make them feel young? or keep them young? remind them of that certain child like quality which will always prevail in us no matter how old we may grow or the number of hard knocks we weather in life?
most of them look the same. mdm michelle low looks tired now though. but mrs ramesh, mr wee, mr teo and even teh boo chai looks the same. teh boochai didnt even remember me. but he did remember sth when i mentioned lydia. it wouldve shot his head if i mentioned seetaram panday but didnt get to that. lim kuan min's the same. shawal B hussein is gone. replaced by a vp mr yap.
btw: congrats to zhenghua on results last friday. i heard there was a six pointer. finally! after 3 years! and zhenghua's name is on the list of sch's with at least one student with 7 a1's!
on to non job matters, i went to east coast to blade again. and it was a shakey affair :P went to chinatown also one day when we weren't working. a few visits to the library and that's about it. watched a few movies. celebrated swee's birthday. many luncheons and a few dinners. latest include v day dinner w denise,jeremy,charq and swee and blading on wednesday.
rumours of results coming out is in the air. its too soon. i havent played enough yet! im liking this life now! and with results out i have to make my decision abt ballet. i think i figured it already. i'll ask ms ong what options are there in jobs whereby you can integrate dance in besides teaching and weigh my options from there. it has come to my attention my folks have spent too much on this ballet business for a very long time. its only logical i should make sth out of it.
and not to forget! my basic theory is next wednesday! haha. yes very slow. many friends are on to practical already!
gonna meet swee for lunch again before we head to work. its a late night today..
ps: to those still reading this..thanks for even bothering to visit after so long!
charlene said a lil' prayer for you at 11:36 AM
