Friday, March 05, 2004
guess what? i didnt go to school again todae! i woke up at 1040. much too late. and i was really appreciating a day in which i can stay home and laze the whole dae. ive been taking in too much polluted outside air for the past few days i thot it'd be best to chill.
just read cheryl's blog and she commented on how she thinks she doesnt have a life. and then i started to think about mine too. i guess the same goes for me. i was also getting bored throughout the day todae, whilst walking to get lunch [at 5] i was thinking about some of my hobbies, and to my utter horror, i couldnt come up with any. but the first thing to shoot off was DANCE! and then i realised that sometimes its becoming more or a chore than hobby and not really counted cos its sth i HAVE TO go for, if not receive a shelling.
occasionally i go for swims at dad's club but that is so so rare!and u get this picture..
mondaes to fridae, its school all the way. i reach home real late, slack on the com, do abit of work if any or if im feeling hardworking (Almost never) then go to bed. and the same routine goes for the rest of the week. snd yea, i guess computer, internet surfing can be considered a hobby but i really waste as much as half my life away not doing anything worth it. internet's not all that fun anywae. it drains me and doesnt leave me feeling very good. just that my eyes get all ditzy and i feel wasted away. not a very good thing.
come saturdae, i have no time for leisure, simply because, i wake up late, (due to e previous late night on e com) spend the eaely afternoon travelling to ballet, spend the mid afternoon till early evening at ballet, then spend the rest of the evening travelling home. then i on the com again, then sleep late, to wake up feeling like shit on sundae morning. drag through church, afternoons with choir and evening with sunset service. then its night AGAIN! i pack my bags for monday and sleep.
now tell me, where's the fun in ALL that?
the only person who messaged me today regarding my absence at school today was maryanne. thanks dear girl for your info. i think u read this and yea, :) thanks again.
no one from my og or class even messaged. celine used to. i guess she wasnt in school today. i dont wanna sae it out loud but it seems i dont fit in. like i dont have a special place w anybody in particular. when im around. sure they accept me into the circle. but when im gone, i dont think tis even felt. is it me? that i havent made enough of effort to be noticed? even those whom i hope with all my heart wld msg me didnt. and online, no one chats me up. not that i want them to...but...maybe i didnt do enough of my part during orientation. i wanted to just make friends w anybody in general but this was what i got. no indentity w anyone. and now it hurts. i was just afraid of ending up with sumone hu wldnt suit me so i didnt wanna hang around too much anyone. and now i hear of some people who have grown so close, who chat on the phone blah blah and i can only look on in envy. -sighs-
watched gilmore girls today.
my silly dear fren called me at nine plus to make sure her gut feeling was correct, tt i wasnt in school. she was SO correct, i didnt even hear her phone call. hehe. but ur guts working fine lydia!;)
oh..tt poor girl think she has some colon problems. dont worry, it'll be fine. go see a doc soon. i'll be praying for you and rayyan.
charlene said a lil' prayer for you at 12:27 AM
