Friday, July 04, 2003
oh. i just submitted e friggin diskette to mr andy already. what happens thereafter, i will not be tuned to care. nono. if it's never again unheard of or talked about, great for me. if i die, even greater.
the darned chinese O's are tomorrow. all my zeal to study the last month is GONE! tomorrow, i shall just try...and remind myself that it's only chiense( yea rite) and just erm...try to pretend i KNOW chinese and just get on with the thing.
hafta report tomorrow at 8. i thot that was bad enuff till josh told me they had to report at 730! haha. poor thing. maybe..worse case- i got the timing wrong myself. but i hope that isnt it, cos ive been telling several pple what time to report, including javier at 8. so if its wrong, we'll all be late together!!
oh. and i had to bloody go for detention on thursdae. one hour, that was bad enuff. we just sat in e parade sq and minded our own business. for me, i took out e anne frank diary thing (yes, im still not done w it) and read. but i wasnt paying much attention, i was trying to act as if it was really getting my attention, oblivious to my surroundings. so the minutes ticked by. i was getting more impatient each time. whatever. the frigging second hand of the watch finally budged one round around e stupid watch face.
it really pisses me. how my parents don't seem to care that i'm always waking up late. rather, they waking me. how many times have i JerkEd outta bed, in total shock and frenzy, having not enough time to slow down to relax, running like a mad woman every morning through the school gate? they think, since i was late once, and was calm and cool about it, they think its -ok- if i continue to be late in future. Just cos i don't voice it out doesn't mean im at peace w it. do they have ANY idea how many lates forms i've got? well. it was one this week. like..on the first week of school! and on average, i get at least two a week maybe. do they have any idea that i have a "latecomer's" form stuffed in-between almost all my textbooks (depending which ones i have in my arms tt day).lets see, i have one in poa, chem, geog, physics and math too, and one previously in my bag pocket. don't they seem to REALISe tt its gonna affect my conduct?! i was spotted sitting outside sch at nine plus last yr, and my conduct just plunged down all the way to a fair. i don't think they even noticed that "conduct- fair" section in my report book last year. Sometimes i really wonder if they friggin care. sure. sis was the best student and all that crap. she did her homework, aced her tests and never gave problems. but cos of that , that they didn't have to get to know much about the going ons in school, can't they at least care about e more major stuff such as lateness n stuff like tht? i don't ask for them to know every single thing i do in school or how i fare in every single test or exam. some may think to a certain extent, that it's good that im left to take charge of all that i do on my own, but can't they at least care to ask sometime or something, seriously. i bet i can even go thru an exam w/o them even knowing tt im in e midst of it. i bet they wouldn't even know abt listening compre tmr if i hadn't told them. if i simply said it was "supplement class" or sth. they wld'n't have e slightest idea tt its so totally NOT. back to the main thing, i just don't get it on why don't they even care that im ALWAYS late in school? In school. grades aren't everything. they look at such conduct too. and when they come to know of my habitual lateness, i'll be blackmarked, as i guess i already am.
i just don't know how they can be so insensitive or un-knowing regarding such things.
Today was fine. at least i wasn't late. thanx to Lydia who called. it's horrid of me to rely on frens to wake me up and all. i even have to go to tt extent. relying parents for such stuff just goes to bullshit.
i've tried to set e stupid phone on alarm but its doesn' work.
tomorrow will be O level listening. what i fear most, is not even the paper, but being late. wth.
charlene said a lil' prayer for you at 10:46 PM
